Friday, 19 May 2017

It's the Little Things

On Monday she turned and waved and got on a plane to fly 10,000 km away. 



It's not like she's not been away before. The past two years she's been living on campus at Redeemer University, only coming home for Christmas, summer, and some long weekends. But somehow knowing that this is farther away and longer without time together makes it different. 

The first days are hard, with lots of checking online to see if there's an email or a hangouts message, or even notification of a Skye call waiting to happen. In between the checking, though, there's daily life that distracts us from the vacant spot in our hearts. 

And then it hits. An accidental setting of 5 places at the dinner table instead of 4. Hearing the rain pounding during the night and wondering if she has a tin roof to sing her to sleep when the rain comes. Folding laundry and finding one last item of her clothing that got put through the washing too late to pack.

Those are the things that undo us.


::

Three months will pass quickly in the great scheme of things. This is an opportunity I wouldn't have even suggested that she pass up; it could have been made just for her, my God-loving, Missionary-loving, Missionary Kid-loving, Uruguay-loving, children-loving daughter.

But still, it's the little things that make the heart squeeze and the tears pour.


Extra joy? A family photo the day before departure. 

Sunday, 2 April 2017

Venturing into Mason's Alveary (b)

(Part 2 of 2)

This is Part 2 of a two part series. In Part 1 I  shared about the decision to join Mason's Alveary, and explained why I - an educator and home educator with over 15 years experience with Charlotte Mason's educational model - would turn to a paid CM curriculum. In Part 2 I will describe some of our experiences over the first 2 terms of working with the Alveary.

::

We have now completed 2 terms of work with Mason's Alveary, and the pilot project for the elementary curriculum is almost complete. The Charlotte Mason Institute has opened registration for the 2017-2018 year, and many people are asking questions about it. Because of that, I want to share some of our experience with it by exploring a series of questions.


Aidan's nature journal entry of a feather

What did we hope to gain from participating in Mason's Alveary?

As you've already read, the past few years have been challenging for me. I was facing a decision about whether we could actually continue home educating our children, let alone following the teacher-intense method that we love.

By joining the Alveary, I hoped to be able to successfully carry on homeschooling my son despite the frequent sick days and medical appointments that I would be facing. I hoped that by 'contracting out' the planning portion of our school, I would be able to put my energy into carrying out the plan and to making sure that the beautiful parts of a Mason education were not sacrificed because my energy had been spent on things that weren't direct interaction with my son. I hoped to be able to provide the beautiful education I longed for him to have despite my limitations.

There are areas of a Mason education that I have done well in the past, and others where I struggled. I hoped that the Alveary would give me support and accountability in those areas (think: handicrafts, nature study, composition, exams).


What benefits did I experience from it?

PLANS: Our year with the Alveary began with access to term plans and lesson plans for Term 1. Experts in Charlotte Mason and curriculum development had worked long hours preparing a cohesive program for the families to use. We were free to use the lesson plans step by step, or to use our own previous experience to guide our decision-making in that regard; the lesson plans were there as a type of crutch that could be used as needed, and left alone when it wasn't. 

SCHEDULES: The weekly schedules included all the subjects that make up a CM school day, from literature to sol-fa, from history to foreign language. Recommendations for drawing practice, handicrafts, and time outdoors were included, together with resources to help in carrying out those subjects. The frequency and number of minutes for each subject in the week were clearly spelled out, and sample schedules were provided so that we could have a starting point for laying out our weeks while adhering to Mason's guidelines of varied subjects and short lessons. With only one student, setting up my week was a piece of cake. Families with multiple children had a trickier time coordinating that, but had the support of the Alveary team to work out their schedules. Because of this program I've learned about some of the magic that spreadsheets can do; a video tutorial specifically on setting up schedules and manipulating data within those sheets was one of the most basic benefits I received from the Alveary. 

SUPPORT: As we moved through the days and weeks of terms 1 and 2, we often encountered questions about how to implement a particular aspect of the curriculum. Sometimes it was a weakness or unfamiliarity on my part, sometimes it was a challenge that my son faced. Either way, help was only an email away. We received well thought out replies to our questions about why things were set up in specific ways, about learning differences, about habit formation, and about different strategies when things weren't going well.

In a Mason education, every practice is based on a principle. The responses we received from the Alveary team were grounded in a thorough understanding of those principles, and each teaching parent was encouraged to look at the principles to guide their own decision-making. In this way, Mason's Alveary is constantly trying to ensure that the parents/teachers are learning and growing in their own methodological understanding so as not to need to look to any one else as an 'expert' but to be able to make our own decisions. As one with a lot of prior experience with Mason's writing, I still appreciated being directed back to the principles, and knowing that when I had a specific question, those principles were at the core of the response.

COMMUNITY: My dream would be to have a vibrant Charlotte Mason community in South Western Ontario - ideally within my own community - with whom I can meet regularly to study Mason's 6 Volumes, organize regular group nature walks, share resources and ideas, and walk this unique life together. But that isn't possible right now. So, a happy side-benefit of participating in the pilot was the built-in community that I became part of online.

The facebook group and forum have become a good source of help when I'm troubleshooting a problem in our home school; the other parents are all following the same program I'm in, so we're on the same page for history, literature, etc. When I look for suggestions about how to better use a specific book, I know that all the responses are from people who have been using the same book in the same way. The tone of both groups is positive, encouraging, sympathetic. We're in this together! We have shared victories together as well as deep challenges, and I have found a community of women who will pray us through specific times of need.

I suppose the downside of this is that now I long to live in Illinois, or Minnesota, or Hawaii, or Kentucky, or North Carolina, or Manitoba, or . . .

TRAINING and INSPIRATION: The Alveary provided me with a source for learning how to bring in some of the subjects I was weak in. Bit by bit we've been gaining practice and experience with dry brush painting and drawing, with handicrafts, with good use of our spare time, with development of the habit of attention. I have been able to put together a plan that enables my son to carry on with some of his work when I'm not able to function. The accountability of having paid for a curriculum plan increases my incentive to be consistent. Knowing that I must submit exams (a requirement for the pilot, but not for regular membership) means that I'm doing them with my son, and the time I spend evaluating them, seeing what was weak and what we might have unintentionally neglected, has made my home school better.



What challenges did we face? 

Any pilot project is bound to have bumps along the way. We went into this expecting bumps, so when they came they weren't a surprise, and we dealt with them.

Some bumps that were pilot-related? Changes in some books after books had been purchased. Typos in lesson plans. Missing or broken links and other minor errors were discovered, but quickly rectified with an email to the administrator. All of that will be eliminated in the post-pilot years, which is good to know.

The sheer volume of information that was made available was overwhelming at times. I had to learn to take in what I could and put the rest aside for when I was able to handle it, remembering that even improving one area was improving, and the fact that I was able to improve something rather than continuing to simply stay where I was already was a significant difference from the previous few years!

Other bumps were not pilot-related, but were bumps nonetheless. Working out a new schedule with new priorities - priorities that were part of a Mason education but had been neglected somewhat in our home for the past few years - required flexibility and patience on both my part and my son's. There were times when one or the other of us resented having to work with a certain book that wasn't going well, but it taught us to press on and find ways to overcome the hurdles. Dealing with lost time because of appointments and illness. My temperament is to be a rule-follower: if something is written down, it must be done. So when lessons were missed, I would want to make them up. That error caused our first term to stretch way beyond what was healthy. I've had to learn to move on, let things go, and be okay with that. I'm still working on that one. But I'm learning.

As Canadians there was tweaking that had to happen to make our national history line up with the history cycle of the Alveary. We had to decide which resources would adequately make up the Canadian content that is necessary for our context: folk songs, citizenship and government, poetry, history, literature. All those things need to have a small amount of adjustment to satisfy our desire to have our own country's story represented in the program. This, too, is being worked on, and while it will be some time before a full Canadian adaptation is ready, I'm satisfied that we're getting the best we can as it is.



Would I recommend the Alveary? and To whom would I recommend it?

Yes, most definitely. The program is deeply researched, sound, tested, and supported. The cost of a year's subscription has been more than paid for from my perspective, as it has given me space to focus on the areas I wanted to (like developing our nature study habits and one-on-one lessons with my son) while still having the other areas taken care of (such as planning, troubleshooting, selecting resources) and allowing me to do some of those other things that need to be done in the home (like cooking meals and cleaning bathrooms). Could someone do these things all themselves? Certainly. But time is finite, as is energy. If you choose to pay to have someone do some of the important load-bearing for your home school, the Alveary gives you great bang for your buck!

While I think that anyone could use it, there are a couple of groups of people who I'd encourage to explore the Alveary route:

Firstly, moms who are just starting out with a Mason education and want to be able to implement her principles pretty well, right off the bat. The Alveary gives that mom the opportunity to start right in with all the lessons, while supporting her own learning of the principles and methodology along the way, rather than having to 'wing it' for a while as she gets her Mason feet under her. She can start with one or even multiple children, knowing that they are getting a good Mason education immediately!

Secondly, I'd recommend it to moms who, like me, are going through a long-term crisis, whether they're new to Mason or have been following her for years. The supports that go with the Alveary, the accountability, the encouragement - all those things are valuable assets when life is a challenge. We have to recognize that we can't do everything ourselves all the time, and that there is no shame in getting help to make sure that the things that are a priority for your family happen.

Mason's Alveary has been a gift to my entire family this year. I can honestly say that I would not have been giving my son the education any of us desired for him had we gone a different route. I thank God for that moment at the CMI conference in June 2016 when the pilot project was presented. It saved my Mason home school. 


(This post has been included in a Blog Carnival about Mason's Alveary. You can find other people's stories about their experience with the Alveary by following the links.)

Venturing into Mason's Alveary

(Part 1 of 2)


Earlier in the year I wrote about the miraculous provision that allowed me to keep my youngest son schooling at home during what has been one of the most difficult years of my life. This is Part 1 of a two part series. In Part 1 I will share more about the decision to join Mason's Alveary, and explain why I - an educator and home educator with over 15 years experience with Charlotte Mason's educational model - would turn to a paid CM curriculum. In Part 2 I will describe some of our experiences over the first 2 terms of working with the Alveary.

::

For over 15 years I have studied and practiced a Charlotte Mason education with my children. Mason's philosophy of education - her philosophy of life - resonated deeply with me from the first time I encountered her work, and I knew that it was what the Lord wanted for our family. I made use of all the print and online resources I could get my hands on, not to mention the live interactions that I was able to enjoy. For 10 years I drove 1 1/2 hours each way every six weeks to attend a Mason study group, for several of those years sharing in the leadership of that group whose membership numbered, at times, close to 70 people!

In 2010 we moved to Uruguay where we served as church planting missionaries, and I continued schooling the kids while participating in full time ministry. By the time we returned to Canada in 2014, I was burned out, and my health was suffering. Our eldest was now done school and looking to her post-secondary career, and I still had two children at home. For 2 years I struggled along, trying to meet their educational needs as my health declined.

Jump to spring of 2016. Because of my health it looked like the educational model I loved was not going to be possible in my home any longer. We were considering all options for our second child, who was to start high school in the fall: online classes, prepackaged curriculum, enrollment in a brick and mortar school. And we were looking at what options we might pursue to keep our youngest, starting Grade 6, home at least until high school.

In June of 2016 I attended my 5th Charlotte Mason Institute conference, and my heart was breaking. Here I was surrounded by a community of people from across the continent who were pursuing a Mason education, plenary speakers and workshop facilitators were inspiring those in attendance to press on, to continue learning, growing, and implementing Mason's work in their school classrooms and home schools, and I was feeling like I just couldn't do it any more.

During one plenary session, Dr. Jennifer Spencer shared about a new project that the CMI was working on: Mason's Alveary, a curriculum and teacher training program complete with year plans, lesson plans, scheduling helps, webinars, video tutorials, and more. My heart began to rise. Could this be the solution that would enable us to keep BOTH our boys home? With all that support, could I make it through another year without completely caving in? I listened intently as the details unfolded.

Then the bad news: The pilot project that was being rolled out would only go through 8th grade. It wouldn't be the high school solution I was looking for after all. But, I wondered, if I was only going to have my youngest with us for a few more years, would it enable me to give him the Mason education I desired for him despite my own weaknesses?

We decided to try it, and enrolled to participate in the pilot project with one student in Form 2a, Grade 6. Mason's Alveary has been the backbone of our school year for 2016-2017.

In Part 2 you can read about our experience with the Alveary over the first two terms. Join me?


(This post has been included in a Blog Carnival about Mason's Alveary. You can find other people's stories about their experience with the Alveary by following the links.)

Tuesday, 21 March 2017

Pussy Willows

Somehow I have the impression deep in my heart that pussy willows are one of my mother's favourite things. Maybe it's because I remember them being displayed in an early spring arrangement on the stereo cabinet. Or maybe it's because I associate her with soft beautiful things. Either way, there is a connection from my memory to my heart which has given me, in turn, an appreciation for these little things, so full of hope.

But somehow, when I do remember to look for them, I always seem to go looking too late in the season, and I miss them. Has there ever been a spring when I've had pussy willows in a vase on my piano? I don't think so.

::

Last week I was given the opportunity to gather with some other mothers who home educate their children, an opportunity for the women to gather and fill our own hearts. The afternoon was just for us, no children. That alone was a rarity. But the beauty that was packed into the few hours together? That was miraculous! A nature walk; tea with scones and jam and clotted cream and berries and oh, so much more; a book giveaway; nature study; an exchange of gifts to refresh our lives; rich conversations about books and history and life and hopes. 

The topic of the nature study was none other than those sweet pussy willows. Samples from two different sources were brought in, and we spent time looking, sharing observations, listening to nature lore about them, hearing details about their characteristics. 

Who doesn't love those little white-grey buds that look like tiny kitten toes peeking out? Who can resist touching? 


My nature journal entry of those pussy willows.

A few days later, on a walk with my family, I saw them myself, growing by the wayside of our trail. I might have missed them if I hadn't already been made aware that THIS was the time to be watching. 

Isn't that key? Not just to look, but also to look at the right time?

Tuesday, 17 January 2017

A year ago I thought I'd have to give it all up. I'd already seen my eldest graduate and head off to university, but now it looked like I'd have to release my younger two to the brick-and-mortar schools of our town or some neighbouring city. 

Because I just couldn't do it.

Everything in me was breaking down, from the physical to the emotional. Years of chronic debilitating headaches, steadily getting worse and more frequent, had worn me down to nothing; the culture shock and identity crisis of returning to Canada after four years on the mission field with my family left me floundering much longer than I'd expected. Facing extreme fatigue, inability to concentrate, being bed-ridden with pain three to four days a week, tears pouring down my face constantly - I was no longer able to imagine how I could continue schooling my sons who would be entering grades 9 and 6 in the fall. Panic attacks coursed over me whenever I considered what seemed to be the only way forward. But as things stood, I was not going to be doing them a service by keeping them home, as much as my heart longed to. 

Prayers. Tears. Crying out for help. Long conversations with my Dear Man. Asking God. Pleading with Him to give me the strength and health to continue.

But it was not His direction for me. Not the way I pictured it. Not the way I planned. Because God gave us two paths to follow this year, two routes unlike any I'd expected when I fell at His feet and begged for answers a year ago.

My Little Man, now 14, has entered a brick-and-mortar school in town. And it's okay. I'm not thrilled that he's there, but I'm content that this is how it must be. It's been a learning curve for him and for us, entering the school system after a family absence of 24 years! We're making it work. (And I really need a new 'name' for him, as he's not little anymore!)

And Brown-Eyed Boy, who's 11, almost 12? Through miraculous provision he has been able to continue being home schooled. The miracle of it? I didn't have to sacrifice our philosophy of education and turn to a curriculum that didn't fit who we are in order to continue. We've been gifted with the opportunity to participate in the pilot project for a Charlotte Mason curriculum which has truly been the one thing that allowed me to keep this youngest child of mine at home at least a while longer. It is God's gift. 

The loss I feel over my second child's abrupt and unexpected early departure from our daily school is waning. I see him thriving in many areas that I couldn't have served him. I see him tackling things that are causing him to grow in new ways. Daily I pray for him; daily I reaffirm God's covenant promises to him; daily I trust him to the care of the One Who knows him and loves him more than I do. It's the only way.

At the same time, I'm thankful for this year (dare I hope for 'these years'?) with my third child, for an opportunity to give him the best that I can while I still have the chance. Because I realize now that I might not have him here as long as I originally thought. 

Though I pray it won't be over soon.

I've committed to coming back to PeaceLedge, to exploring once again the writing path that the Lord has used so often to teach me, to heal me, to convict me, and to love me. He is here. He IS "The Place Called Peace". Maybe you'll join me in looking for Him on this precarious edge between safety and vulnerability, between contentment and complacency?